Speaker 1: 0:35

Hi, I'm Lexi. I'm a freshman at American Canyon High School and I'm going to read 1 John, 3, 10 through 18. This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are. Anyone who does not do what is right is not God's child. Nor is anyone who does not love their brother and sister what is right is not God's child. Nor is anyone who does not love their brother and sister, for this is the message you have heard from the beginning we should love one another.

Speaker 1: 1:03

Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brothers were righteous. Do not be surprised, my brothers and sisters, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed from death to life because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him. This is how we know what love is. Jesus Christ laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters, if anyone has material possessions and sees a brother, and that is the word of the Lord. Thanks be to God. Good job, girl, you got it.

Speaker 2: 1:54

Thank you, lexi. Well, if you're new with us, we are going through verse by verse. We're teaching the Bible here in these little letters in the back of the New Testament. It's called 1st, 2nd and 3rd John. It was written by the gospel writer who wrote John. Now he's an old guy and this is like some of his last words and so we've been going through verse by verse. We're in chapter three today. We're going to do verses 10 through 18 in chapter three. So if you want to open up your view version, or if you actually brought a Bible today, I'll throw some step up on the verse. But what a week. Right, here we go.

Speaker 2: 2:29

Life is full of camps. You're either in one or you're in the other. Think about this there's Apple or there's Android. Who's Apple? Who's Android? The robot? Oh, okay, we're pretty split in here. Or you have, like Marvel versus DC, chick-fil-a or cane sauce which one? You know? Chick-fil-a. We just go there for the sauces. Let's be honest, right? You have a cold brew or frappuccinos? Or what about giants or A's right? Come on, oakland, you're killing us, can't even say that. No more, right? Or are you just team? Just DM me, or are you team? Why don't you just call me like a normal human right, and some of those divisions are silly, but let's be honest, they matter in the moment to a lot of us. Whole friend groups can go silent on road trips just because someone thinks that pineapple goes on pizza. Right, friends have been ruined over worse, because why Camps matter. We like to know which side that we're on, and it's not just about what gadgets or food, it's how we live.

Speaker 2: 3:35

And this generation builds identity around tribes. You're in a camp based on your music taste, your political party, your sports team, your coffee order. Some of you are thrifting crew. Only Some of you are. You know, let's go to Target and Starbucks Saturday morning crew. We even divide ourselves cat versus dog. Right Go, dog. Let's go to Target and Starbucks Saturday morning crew. We even divide ourselves cat versus dog right Go, dog, let's go. I'm team dog.

Speaker 2: 4:00

So why do we care so much about camps? It's because camps tell us something about identity. They tell us who we belong to. They give us this sense of being known. And that's exactly what John is addressing in this letter, except he doesn't talk about coffee orders or Marvel movies. He actually goes straight to the jugular. He says this and you heard it just read you're either a child of God or you are a child of the devil, which we go like whoa easy there. Like imagine dropping that in your small group. Like hey, thanks for bringing the chips, you're a Satan, you're a child, satan's child. Like you're just like oh, that's just not a good icebreaker, it doesn't really build community and it feels extreme. We want to soften this stuff. But John's not being dramatic in this moment, he's just being clear. He's cutting right through the noise of all these little camps saying when it comes to your ultimate identity, there's only two sides. There's only two options here. There's only two families. You're either in God's family or you're not.

Speaker 2: 5:02

And John says that ultimately, your life, how you live, how you love, will actually reveal which camp you're really in. And he starts it out by saying it right here, in verse 10. This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are. Anyone who does not do what is right is not God's child. Nor is anyone who does not love their brother or their sister. Notice the word know right there. John doesn't say this is how you'll feel. He says this is how you're gonna know, you're not gonna guess about this, you're not gonna hope, you're not gonna vibe check, you're gonna know.

Speaker 2: 5:40

And John's writing to these young believers at this time in the first century church who at this time, are confused, and so he doesn't pull any punches, he just wants to get right to it. He says plainly here's how you're going to know and how you're going to know you're a child of God or you're a child of the devil. Strong words, right, like seriously. Lots of us would rather just say like here's, if he was going to rewrite it, here's how you really know if you're following God and then also just who needs a little help. Right, that's how we'd rather like say it nicely, like that.

Speaker 2: 6:10

But John isn't making this up. Why he's echoing Jesus? Because we learned this. He was there, he was there from the beginning. He talks about this. He saw it, he lived it. He's literally the last of the eyewitnesses. And so all he's doing right here is he's writing what Jesus said, and yes, jesus really did call people children of the devil.

Speaker 2: 6:31

We see this actually in John's gospel, chapter eight, where he tells religious leaders he says everyone who sins is a saved sin. If God were your father, you would love me, but you belong to your father, the devil, easy, jesus right. And these leaders. What's going on right here is they claimed Abraham as their father and they claimed that they were God's chosen one, but their actions what's going on here is their actions showed otherwise and then they wanted to kill Jesus. They were gonna try to reject truth. They wanted to follow their own decisions, and Jesus exposes the lie. He says if you don't love me, then you're not of God. And so John remembers this moment. He was there when this happened, and now what he's doing is he's passing it on and saying hey, friends, there's only two ways to live. He calls us children.

Speaker 2: 7:21

Beloved, says you're either following Christ, belonging to God's family, or you're following lies, and lies come from the father of lies. See, these false teachers that he's talking about have left the church. They were claiming that they're still followers. They're claiming they're still Christians. People were saying ah, you can believe in Jesus and live however you want. Sin doesn't really matter. And John's like no way, like that's not how family resemblance works. In the first century world, this would have landed really heavy. Family was everything. You built your identity around family. You didn't build it around hobbies and playlists. Your family's name is what actually identified you, and if you were dishonest, if you were lazy or you were cruel, you didn't just embarrass you, you dishonored the whole family. And John's saying it's the same thing for us to understand spiritually that God's kids carry God's resemblance. And so it asks this question if he's your father, people should start to see his traits in you and me.

Speaker 2: 8:36

So what's the family test? Well, the test isn't like how many worship nights you attend, how many verses you've highlighted in YouVersion, or how many sermons that you've heard. Not how many devotions you've started and not finished right. Not how many times that you've prayed before a test that you didn't study for, or whether you drop a cool Greek word like agape and casual conversation right. The test is simply this.

Speaker 2: 9:01

It's simple Do you do what's right Righteousness and do you love people, relationships and both matter and both are inseparable. Think about it like this If someone says like, yeah, I'm vegan, except for bacon, you're not vegan right. Or if someone says like I'm committed to you, except I'm just talking to three other people on the side, what You're not committed right. It's the same way If you claim to be in God's family but your life doesn't actually show righteousness and love. There's not resemblance there, and that's it. That's what he's saying.

Speaker 2: 9:41

The test is righteousness and love, and here's the kicker you can't separate them. Doing what's right without love actually turns you into a self-serving, self-righteous Pharisee. Turns you into a self-serving, self-righteous Pharisee. Loving people without righteousness turns you into a doormat who excuses sin. It's like peanut butter and jelly you can eat them separately, but when they're together, that's the family resemblance, that's peanut butter, jelly time, right. So here's the question that John presses on us when people look at your life, do they see the family resemblance? Do they see your heavenly father in your words, in your choices, in your relationships, or do they see something else? Because, at the end of the day, family resemblance it can't be faked.

Speaker 2: 10:37

Verses 11 through 12 says this, for this message you have heard from the beginning we should love one another. Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. So now, right here, john's actually pulling from one of the earliest human stories after the fall Cain and Abel. It's literally like on page four of the entire Bible. You can go read it later. Both of these brothers, they're asked to bring offerings to God. Abel brings, like the best of his flock, the firstborn, the choicest. Abel brings some, like some fruits from the soil, in other words, like leftovers. It's like leftovers, and Abel brings God his best and Cain just brings what's convenient. And then God accepts Abel's offering then and not Cain's.

Speaker 2: 11:23

And so what happens is Cain begins to burn with jealousy and he stews on it. And then God even warns him. He says this why are you angry? This is to Cain. Why is your face downcast? If you do what's right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, this is so good.

Speaker 2: 11:42

Sin is crouching at your door and it desires to have you, but you must rule over it. That is such a powerful image, sin crouching at your door. It's like that stray cat that keeps coming around waiting for you to open the door and you're like no right. Or that creepy clown that's in a horror movie just standing outside of your house. Sin is persistent, it waits. And then, the second you open the door, what happens? Boom, it pounces. And so Cain. What happens is he ignores God's warning. He takes Abel out into a field, he picks up a rock, he kills him. It was literally the first murder in human history and it wasn't about money, politics or power, just jealousy.

Speaker 2: 12:30

And here's why John uses this story because jealousy and bitterness live in us too. Maybe not like pick up a rock level, but it starts in smaller ways, like a friend that gets engaged while you're still single. You smile, but inside you're thinking why not me? Thinking why not me? Or a coworker that gets promoted even though you trained them. Suddenly their win feels like your loss. Your friend gets noticed for something that you worked hard on. What happens? Resentment grows and you may not murder with a weapon, but you will assassinate with words gossip, shade, subtweets, silent treatment. And Cain's story warns us.

Speaker 2: 13:21

Bitterness is never static, it grows, it starts to mutate and jealousy says I wish I had what they had. And then it turns to bitterness and bitterness says I wish they didn't have it at all. And then it grows to hatred and hatred says I wish they weren't even here. And here's where it gets practical. Bitterness doesn't just ruin the other person, it ruins you. And Cain didn't just lose Abel, he lost himself. He was marked, he was exiled, he became restless and wondering. And that's what bitterness does to us. It eats us from the inside. It turns us became restless and wondering. And that's what bitterness does to us. It eats us from the inside. It turns us into restless wonders, always comparing, never content.

Speaker 2: 14:10

Let's put it in modern terms Cain energy is like roommate drama that escalates. Been there, like when a roommate doesn't do the dishes for like three days, instead of like talking about it, you let resentment fester. And then, by day four, you're slamming cabinets to make a point. And then by day five, like you're sending passive, aggressive texts, by day six, you're plotting to accidentally lock them out. Right, it's silly in that context. But this is how bitterness grows. It eventually always escalates.

Speaker 2: 14:40

And John says don't be like Cain, don't let jealousy and bitterness crouch at your door. You need to slam the door shut and you need to actually rule over it, because if you don't, sin will master you. So here's a question for us Where's bitterness crouching in your life? Who are you secretly jealous of? Whose success feels like your failure? And then, what would it look like to shut the door before jealousy turns into something deadly? Well then, john says this in verses 13 and 14.

Speaker 2: 15:20

Don't be surprised, my brothers and sisters, if the world hates you. We know that we have passed from death to life because we love one another. John says something right here that feels almost obvious Like, don't be surprised if the world hates you. But let's be real, we're surprised. You ever been surprised when someone's like doesn't like you? You're like what Right? We kind of expect, like if I'm nice enough, if I'm cool enough, if I'm loving enough, like, everybody will like us, like we're going to be good.

Speaker 2: 15:49

We want Christianity to be like a well-curated like Instagram profile, all the good vibes and none of the awkward pushback. But John reminds us that loving Jesus doesn't always get applause. Sometimes it actually gets rejection. Why? Because real love cuts against the grain of culture. Let me give you some example. Just like forgiveness versus revenge, these two Culture says cancel them, get even. Jesus says forgive them. That's not popular, right? How about purity versus what feels good? Culture says hook up culture as normal. Jesus says honor God with your body. That makes people's eyes roll, right? Integrity versus cutting quarters. How about this one Culture says do whatever it takes to get ahead. And Jesus says be honest, even when it costs you and that's going to get you mocked at work. Or what about humility versus self-branding? Culture says build your platform, make yourself the brand. And Jesus says die to yourself, serve others, and that don't trend.

Speaker 2: 17:01

Then John goes further, into verse 15. He says anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer. And you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him. If love is absent, what happens? Hate creeps in, and then hate is murder in seed form. Even if you never lay hands on someone, bitterness in your heart is the same spirit that actually drove Cain to kill Abel Like. Think about this. You can murder someone's reputation with gossip. You can murder someone's confidence, friends with cruel words. You can murder someone's joy by constantly dragging them down. And John says that's not life, that's death. But there's hope when you find yourself loving people sacrificially, even if it costs you. That's the evidence, that's the actual proof. It's like spiritual fingerprints showing that you've passed from death to life. So don't panic when love makes you look weird, right. Don't be shocked when integrity isn't popular. Don't be surprised if standing with Jesus means you actually stand out. That's the family resemblance showing Verse 16, he says this is how we know what love is.

Speaker 2: 18:28

Jesus Christ laid down his life for us and we ought to lay our lives for our brothers and sisters. I think if you were to ask a hundred different people to define love, you would literally get how many different answers? A hundred. Some will say it's a feeling, some's going to say it's chemistry. Some are going to say it's commitment. Culture defines love in these different soundbites.

Speaker 2: 18:50

Love is love. You're like what does that mean? Right, good vibes only Follow your heart. But John doesn't give us a slogan here. He points literally to what the cross. Love isn't just butterflies in your stomach or playlists that make you feel good. Love is Jesus laying down his life.

Speaker 2: 19:07

Love is costly. Love bleeds, love sacrifices. And Jesus didn't just say he loved us. What did he do? He actually showed it. He didn't just send like a thinking of you text from heaven, right, he stepped down, entered into our mess, carried our shame and then died in our place. And what John says is if that's the definition of love, then our love has to look like sacrifice too.

Speaker 2: 19:41

Now, laying down your life doesn't usually mean literally dying for someone else, just so you know. It means dying to yourself, it means dying to convenience. At times it means dying to your comfort. And sacrificial love could look like a couple different things. An example time, like choosing to spend an evening with a friend who's going through depression instead of watching another season of whatever just dropped on Netflix, could be money Giving up that extra Starbucks so you can Venmo a classmate who's struggling to afford groceries. Pride Swallowing your ego and being the first to apologize when there's conflict, even when you're only 30% wrong, could look like comfort Serving the kids ministry, showing up to stack chairs or staying late to help clean, even though no one posts a story about it, right?

Speaker 2: 20:37

John also gets painfully practical in verse 17. He says if anyone has material possessions and then sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Now, this one hits hard, right, because it is so easy to scroll past needs. See someone's GoFundMe, see someone's broke down car, someone cry for help and we're just gonna keep on scrolling through life, right? Or worse, you know, typing to somebody like I'm praying for you with no intention of actually helping, that's sacrificial love, that's not. That's just convenient sentiment. Right? There's this huge difference between thoughts and prayers is like this cliche, and thoughts and prayers as like this cliche, and thoughts and prayers as like a commitment. One is words, the other is actions. I knew a college student once who skipped meals so he could put money aside to actually help pay for another student's rent. Nobody knew about it, he didn't post about it and I would say that sacrificial love.

Speaker 2: 21:44

Another story a young woman in our church actually gave up drinking anything but water for a year to save money so she could help build and drill a fresh water well in Uganda, and she did. In fact. We're all gonna have that opportunity coming up in just a couple of weeks. You can see this. Take out your phone real quick, appease me At least. Check out the QR code. You all know how to use that now. So in just a couple of weeks, we're doing something.

Speaker 2: 22:13

Remember that If anyone has material possessions and they have the ability to do stuff and see someone in need, well, I'm going to tell you right now. I will show you pictures. There's one right now. They need water like fresh water, not junky water. We've been doing this for years and we have an opportunity to actually raise money and awareness, not necessarily your money, your friend's money. Think of it that way. You get to invite friends to participate with you and that also raises awareness like, hey, you can do good, we can see brothers and sisters that are in need, we have possessions and we can participate with this. You heard last week some of you are here that we actually have three wells matched if we can get three others raised. So that kind of gives us some energy behind that to do that. So hop in, take a picture of this QR code. Even if you can't walk, you don't have to go walk. You can go away for the weekend or whatever, but you can still participate in something that's bigger than you and that's something that we're going to do collectively and I want you to be able to participate in.

Speaker 2: 23:11

Because why? Sacrificial love costs something, and if it doesn't cost you and I time, money, energy, pride, it's probably just convenience disguised as love. And John's point is really clear Real love looks like Jesus, and if we call ourselves his family, then our love should carry the family resemblance of sacrifice. Verse 18, dear children, let us not love with words or speech, but with actions. And in truth, verse 18, what's the deal here? Talk is cheap, right Words are easy, action is costly, and we live in a world full of statements and hashtags and slogans and bio quotes and t-shirts.

Speaker 2: 24:01

People love to declare like what they stand for and where they stand. But John says love isn't proven in your caption, it's proven in your calendar. Think about it like this Saying I love my church is easy. But actually serving, giving, showing up when it's an inconvenient, that's love. Saying I care about the poor, it's easy. But choosing to sponsor a kid, raise money for a well, buy groceries for a single mom, serve at a shelter, that's love. Saying I'm praying for you is easy. But actually dropping what you're doing and then praying for someone right there in the moment, that's love.

Speaker 2: 24:43

And it's not that John is like anti-words, it's just that he's saying words without action are hollow. Words don't heal wounds, actions do. Words don't carry groceries, actions do. Words don't change a lonely Friday night into hope. Showing up does.

Speaker 2: 25:05

And John doesn't just say actions, he actually says actions in truth, because sometimes actions can be fake too, you know, like done for clout or image, just for the applause, like I'm just doing this to get some recognition because I've done it. But love and truth, that's authentic friends and that's what family looks like. So here's the question Are you just saying it or are you showing it? So then it begs this. So how the heck do we love like this? John makes it sound so simple right, just love one another. But we all know it's not that simple, because you know who you're sitting next to right. People are complicated, people hurt us, people betray us. So how do we actually live this out in real life? Well, here's five quick steps, and each one gets messy, practical and doable.

Speaker 2: 26:03

The first one is this. It's straight to it Love is a command, not an option. Jesus didn't say like, if you're in the mood to forgive, right. He didn't say love people when they deserve it. No, he said love one another as I have loved you. Love isn't a suggestion here, it's an order. It's like being on a team when a coach tells you like hey, go run that play, and you're like I'm not really feeling it. What do you do? No, you run the play, right. I once heard a guy say he're like ah, I'm not really feeling it. What do you do? No, you run the play right. I once heard a guy say he's like I'll love people when God gives me the gift of love and I'm like, bro, that's not how it works, right? Loving isn't a gift you wait for, it's a command you actually obey.

Speaker 2: 26:47

The second one is this make it about God. This is way easier to do. If you do this, I'm telling you make it about God, not about them. That will give you so much space. If you wait for people who deserve your love, you'll be waiting forever, like you're gonna be waiting a long time. Some people will never apologize. Some people will never acknowledge the pain that they have caused you, and that's why John roots love in God, not people. We love because he first loved us. Think about it like a power source. If your ability to love is actually just plugged into people, it's gonna short circuit real fast. But if it's plugged into God, then you'll have the power to keep loving and you don't have to change. I knew a girl once who kept showing kindness to a coworker who, like constantly, was mocking her for her faith. She didn't do it because her coworker deserved it. She did it because her love came from God and eventually, eventually, the coworker began to ask questions about Jesus.

Speaker 2: 27:50

Number three remember what God did for you. Just remember, sit and reflect. Remember what God did for you. Just remember, sit and reflect. Remember what God did. It's hard to stay bitter when you remember how much you've been forgiven for right. Jesus tells a parable in the gospel of Matthew about a servant who owed a king millions of dollars and then this king forgave this debt. And then the servant went out and like choked a guy who owed him like 20 bucks. That's what it looks like when forgiven people refuse to forgive. It's ugly. And when you're tempted to withhold love, remember God didn't withhold love from you. He forgave you at your worst. He loved you when you weren't even lovable. And if you remember that, that perspective softens your grip on grudges.

Speaker 2: 28:39

Number four, it's this Short, honest prayers. Pray short, honest prayers Seriously. Sometimes we just have to. We feel like we have to do too much. Short, honest prayers. Sometimes all you can pray is this God, help me, not hate them. Today, that's okay. God can work with that right.

Speaker 2: 28:59

One of my friends had a father who abandoned him as a kid and he said for years, the only prayer that he had was this God, help me, want to forgive them, help me, want to forgive them. And it started with this actually, god, I don't want to forgive them, help me, want to forgive them. And it started with this actually, god, I don't want to forgive them, but help me want to. That's honest, that's really honest. And over time, what happened? God started to change his heart. Forgiveness came slowly, but it eventually came. Don't underestimate the power of raw, messy prayers. You don't have to like sound holy, you just got to be real.

Speaker 2: 29:41

Number five, the last one is this Let God be judge. Let God be judge. Forgiveness doesn't mean pretending what happened was okay. Just want you to know that. It doesn't mean that there aren was okay. Just want you to know that. It doesn't mean that there aren't consequences. What it means is that you hand justice over to God. Romans 12 says this do not take revenge, my dear friends. It is mine to avenge. I will repay, says the Lord. When you forgive, you're not saying what they did doesn't matter. Hear that so clearly. What you're saying is I'm not the judge, god is, and what it is is. It's like putting down a heavy weight. You're not excusing them. What you're doing is you're freeing yourself.

Speaker 2: 30:25

And when you put these five steps together, love stops being an abstract concept and it starts being a daily practice. It's not glamorous, it won't always get applause, but it looks like family resemblance. So what if we looked like family? Can you imagine a community where grudges die quickly, where gossip doesn't survive longer than a spark because it gets drowned out by encouragement. Survive longer than a spark because it gets drowned out by encouragement, where generosity flows so naturally that nobody in the room worries about bills anymore. It actually has happened before.

Speaker 2: 31:01

Look at, next, where forgiveness isn't rare, it's the norm. Picture a church where people don't have to pretend because love covers shame, and where conflict doesn't get ignored but it also doesn't end friendships or end someone's life in an assassination, where sacrifice isn't seen as an extra credit Christianity but as the family resistance. That's what God is pointing us towards. That's what it looks like to be a children of God. And imagine the impact it would have on this community, on your community.

Speaker 2: 31:37

What if, instead of being known for what we're against, we're known that we radically love? What if, instead of Christians being seen as judgmental, the people's first thought was this those people it's going away, those people who will show up when life fall apart? You showed up just in time. This is great. They show up. That's what they're known for. And what if our campuses and workplaces and neighborhoods had living, breathing pictures of Jesus's love through us? Because here's the truth. When God's family looks like God's family, it changes things. That's what turned the Roman empire upside down in the first century. Not fancy buildings, not slick marketing, just ordinary people loving in extraordinary ways.

Speaker 2: 32:31

And John's challenge then lands here is the resemblance in you in extraordinary ways? And John's challenge then lands here Is the resemblance in you? Not perfectly, not just overnight, but is there evidence? Do you have evidence in your life? Is there progress? Because in the end, the only camps that matter, it isn't Apple versus Android or Marvel and DC dog cat, chick-fil-a canes. The only camp that matters is this child of God, you're a child of God, you're a child of God. May we act like it. Would you stand as we respond to the King of Kings as his children?